silence

Image

Pamper Yourself!

Leave a comment

Stress Management Tip #3 – Self-Care and Creativity

Self-care is a concept that is often dismissed by women, frequently because they feel guilty for devoting time to themselves instead of those around them.  Christian women in particular often consider self-care “wrong” or “bad.”  After all, the Bible makes a point of teaching that Christians are to be humble and put others first, right (e.g., Phil. 2:3)?  Well guess what . . . Scripture also teaches that our body is the temple of the Holy Spirit (1 Cor. 6:19) and that we are to take care of it (1 Cor. 3:17).  Proverbs 14:30 teaches that “a heart at peace gives life to the body,” and being so stressed out we can’t fit rest and self-care into our schedule is at odds with having a peaceful heart, wouldn’t you say?

If that’s not enough, the benefits of self-care are backed by science.  Research reveals that taking a “creative break” can be relaxing and rejuvenating.  A recent study demonstrated that participants of varying levels of experience, after engaging in artistic expression for only forty-five minutes, experienced a significant reduction in levels of the stress hormone cortisol (Kaimal, Ray & Muniz, 2016).  Another study found that artistic expression, including dance, writing, visual art (painting, crafting), and music, were beneficial to mental health.  The results of that study “indicated that creative engagement can decrease anxiety, stress, and mood disturbances” (emphasis mine) (Stuckey and Nobel, 2010, p. 261).  Thus, there is ample biblical and scientific support for embracing the discipline of self-care (yes, I called it a discipline!).

Dear one, if you’re earnestly trying to learn effective stress management techniques, you simply must get comfortable with the idea of taking care of YOU, and even – gasp! – pampering yourself!  Try making a list of the things you find relaxing and indulgent, but that don’t cause you to feel guilty afterward (i.e., eating a pint of full-fat ice cream in one sitting, after consuming half a pizza, is not recommended).  So what brave step will you take toward caring for yourself?  It can be simple, inexpensive, and doesn’t even have to take that much time.  Maybe give yourself a pedicure and paint your toes a wild color you love!  Or, or settle in with a favorite book for even half an hour.  Make a crafting date with yourself and get creative making something pretty!  You could sit quietly and listen to soothing music (or, provided you don’t have neighbors super close, turn up your favorite “happy song” and belt it out!), buy yourself some flowers, take a long walk in the woods, have a “home spa” night, take a hot soak . . . whatever it is, it will be unique to you and whatever you’re in the mood for.  Precious one, do this for yourself!

Need individual guidance on how to de-stress your life? Contact me for one-on-one stress management coaching in person, via phone, or on FaceTime!

References

Kaimal, G., Ray, K. & Muniz, J. (2016). Reduction of cortisol levels and participants’ responses following art making.  Art Therapy: Journal of the American Art Therapy Association, 33(2), 74-80. doi: 10.1080/07421656.2016.1166832

Stuckey, H. L., & Nobel, J. (2010). The connection between art, healing, and public health: A review of current literature. American Journal of Public Health, 100(2), 254–263. http://doi.org/10.2105/AJPH.2008.156497

Image

Finding Majesty Amid the Chaos

Leave a comment

If you know me at all, you probably know that I’m not a snow person.  I grew up in North Florida and lived in the South for more than half my life.  I’ve lived in the Midwest and the North and I’ve never developed an affection for the stuff.  The only kind of white Christmas I’ve ever found appealing was one near white sandy beaches.

But today I was driving in the countryside in Upstate New York after an early morning snowfall, on my way to an appointment.  I rounded a corner and honest to Pete, what I saw had tears rolling down my cheeks in seconds.  I crossed over a creek and it was one of the most perfect scenes I’ve ever witnessed.  All the trees had a coat of light, fluffy snow on them.  The rocks in the creek had a coat of snow on them, and the shoreline and the ground in the woods were covered in that same fluffy white snow.  The contrast of the nearly black creek made it all the more stunning.

I was overwhelmed.  I mean, truly humbled, awed and overcome by the beauty of that scene.  Only God can create such splendor.  And that’s what had me crying.  God’s majesty, God’s power, God’s glory, God’s complete rule and love are all around us, every minute of every day.  And He created something for everyone, didn’t He?  Some of us love summer, some of us dream of fall foliage, some love rain, some love snow, some are mountain people, some prefer flat desert lands, some thrive in tropical climes…  and isn’t it just like our great God to gift us with all of it?

I don’t love snow.  I’m a tropics-loving Southern gal.  But there is no denying that I had a momentary love for snow this morning.  I couldn’t safely stop for a photo, but I will try to hold onto that scene in my memory for a long time to come.  I’m glad I was paying attention, that I allowed myself to break out of my thoughts and my planning to really absorb what was before me.

It’s a busy time of year, when it’s easy to become overwhelmed with “to do” lists and stressed out over our schedules, finances, relationships, and all the “shoulds” in our heads.  But I urge you to take a moment and notice the beauty all around you.  Soak it in.  It may help you to remember that you are small, your problems are small, today is short (as is your life here on Earth).  Savor the scenes in the snow as you drive, the atmosphere of Christmas while you shop – the hustle and bustle, the music, the whole scene – and remember the reason for it all.  Jesus.

Now for a cup of hot chocolate…

Image

Monday’s Moment: When God is Silent

1 Comment

We show up.  We carve out the time (time which, incidentally, He saw fit to give us), turn off the phone, computer and television, make arrangements not to be disturbed, settle in with a clear mind and an open heart and a passion to hear from Him, and … silence.

We wonder where He is.  I mean, we’re here.  We’re seeking Him.  Isn’t that what we’re supposed to do?  So, we wait.

And wait.

And still, nothing.

So eventually we get up and get on with the business of living, without having experienced fireworks in our prayer time; without even hearing that whisper we know to be His voice.

Please realize, dear believer, that this is not a spiritual crisis.  It’s a day, an hour, or a moment – one of many come and gone.  No more, no less.  (It’s important to clarify that the silence I am referring to is different from hearing nothing but “noise” in your head (clutter from daily life, etc.) and it’s not the same as having a spiritual block due to sin.  It’s simply silence.)

Here’s the truth of it: we cannot control God! 

Having a hissy fit won’t do it.  Fighting that silence, begging for God to “show up,” struggling against the reality that He is not meeting us in our chosen moment … all these are useless.  Worse, such activity makes it nearly impossible to hear Him when He tries to start a conversation with us.

When this happens in my prayer time, as it did on a prayer and meditation day I recently took, I know in every cell of my being that my God is still with me.  And I know that He loves me unconditionally, no matter how often I disappoint Him.  No, God has not forsaken me.  He is simply choosing not to speak, not to show Himself in that special, powerful way He sometimes chooses to.

I wrote the following in my journal that day, and I want to share it with you with the hope that it will encourage you (and be a reminder to me as well):

“Today, He is demonstrating His power, His sovereignty, His authority.  And because I love God, I also love what He is (not) doing today.  I love this display of Who He is, this reminder that I’m not God – He is.

As a woman who tries to follow Christ and who tries to surrender to God daily, I must be willing to walk the path He put me on with trust and faith, with confidence in who He is and in my relationship with Him, even when He is quiet.  So, I am at peace, even in the silence.

I will continue to show up, continue to call on Him, continue to make space for this precious time.  And I will do so knowing that He will show up again and fill my spirit in that way only He can and does…and He will do it in His time, as He chooses.  When He does, I will, as I always do, bask in His glory, dance with Him, sing with Him, walk with Him and talk with Him, knowing that every moment fades away, going sometimes with joyous praise and sometimes with peaceful silence.

Then I will wait for the next moment – wait and be watchful, wait and listen for that whisper that says, ‘Come, My child … I want to make Myself more fully known to you.’  For I know that moment will come.  I will choose not to be disappointed or frustrated; only to be accepting of what God chooses to do or not to do. For He is great and good and just and will not be controlled.  I am His child.  And because He is the best Father ever – the perfect Father, He will shine His brilliant, warm, loving smile on me again and it will ever be a balm to my spirit.”

And so, I will cherish even His silence.